Bears home alone

R & G are deadLast week grot boy and I made the mistake of leaving the teddies home alone. We were going to the theatre to see Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Dead – a play we knew would be confusing and melodramatic, and NTF (not teddy bear friendly).

Besides, Ccino had declared, “I’m not going to a boring play with lots of talking, talking, talking.” Dwight had agreed, albeit for a different reason, “I don’t want to go. You washed my best dress and it isn’t dry yet. I can’t go, I don’t have anything to wear.”

Nothing could go wrong, we assumed, with them all together and Ted 2 in charge so off we went. We had made sure there were plenty of snacks for Bobby, the grog cupboard locked against Ccino and their favourite toys and games out for them to play with.

So when we came home and saw a cavalcade of cars driving down the street we assumed that one of our neighbours must be having a party. Then, as we neared our house, we saw all the lights were on, the front door open and the teddies on the doorstep, waving goodbye to their friends.

Party's overWhen they saw us walking up the path demanding to know “What’s going on here?” they started jostling. Each one tried to hide behind another, hoping that somehow not being seen would make them invisible. Grot boy swooped them all up in his arms and carried them inside. Lining them up on the couch he turned to me and said, “You’re better at this than me – I’ll leave you to talk to them” before scuttling out the door.

But what could I say?

Telling the teddies that they were not to have any more parties would never work.

Maybe if I insisted that Ccino “friend” me on social media I could keep a watch on what he was planning. But I realised he’d just shift media platforms or open another account so I wouldn’t know.

Asking Ted 2 to tattle on the others wasn’t fair to him.

Guilty teddiesAs I contemplated what to do, they sat in guilty silence. Bobby studied his feet, Ccino hid behind Hephie, Dwight gazed into the distance. None of them would look directly at me.

Grot boy then joined us, suggesting, “Perhaps if we limit Bobby’s credit with the pizza delivery man then at least that would curtail the parties. Bobby wouldn’t want too many coming if there wasn’t a lot of pizza.”

I wasn’t convinced that would work, “Don’t forget Ccino has the monies he’s found and saved. They could just spend that.”

The only practical solution, we decided, was to take the teddies with us wherever we went.

So that’s how we ended up at a lecture last night by the US Ambassador, surrounded by Ministers, diplomats and business leaders with 3 teddies and a hephalump on our laps.

©, 2014


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